If you’re not certain whether your pal is really a true friend, it generally denotes matters that have happened to cause you some doubt. The fact that you cannot be certain signify that the friendship is under question and your gut feelings want to be addressed before you can continue to trust this friendship is worth the effort. So, is this buddy true to you or not?
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Reflect on how you treat each another.
Friends are typically loyal to one another, which denotes that you must not reflect back to countless occasions when they have betrayed you, and vice versa. It’s tough for two people to be friends and not ever let one another down. But, betrayals must not be standard in the relationship.
· If this human never talks about you behind your back, spreads rumors about you, or disappoints you repeatedly in other manners, they probably are your pal. · A good buddy must value you as a person, not view your friendship as a series of transactions.
Determine if they keep your secrets.
Buds are infamous for taking secrets to the grave. If you shared information that you did not need to be known by the general public, your pal keeps their lips sealed.
See if they have your back during tough times.
One of the positives about going through a breakup, losing a dear one, or having a setback in life is that you can count on your buddy to be there. This figure must not only be around during the good times if they are truly your friend.
· Think about a time when you were having a really tough time in your life. Was this human there for you?
· A true pal must be with you through the good, bad, and rough. They must offer to help you however they can, and bring you back from the blue into the light again. A true buddy would never think of leaving you during a tough time in your life.
· A fake buddy, or someone who you are not close to, will probably only stick around when matters are going well. They might even think or say that your issues are a burden to them. That’s the mark of a fake buddy.
See if they are happy when you attain your goals.
A true buddy will not be jealous when you share any success or achievement in your life. They will honor your accomplishments instead of trying to tear you down. To decide if this is an authentic friendship or not, pay attention to see if your pal sticks around while you reach the new aim and high points in your life.
Notice if they prioritize your friendship.
If you know that you can count on this human at the drop of a dime, they probably are your buddy. Good friends prioritize their pals over other situations and relationships, especially when they know you want them.
· For example, even if your buddy is away on holiday, they’ll still make time to call back and check in on you when you fall sick.
Reflect on Your Time Together.
Ask if they make time for you, even when they are pretty busy. While people can remain pals without seeing one another for a longer time, good friendships are sustained with quality time together. Even if your friend is busy with work, school, or other responsibilities, they must still make time to text, call, or hang out. This goes both ways. If you call someone your “buddy” but never seem to have time for them, you may want to reassess how significant they are to you.
Check if they get jealous of other friendships.
A true buddy won’t be jealous or possessive – they must feel confident enough in your friendship that they don’t have to resort to any sort of manipulative control. They realize that you do not have to be in their pond 24/7 in order to validate the friendship. If your pal is trying to prevent you from being friends with other figures, they probably not be a true friend.
Make certain you enjoy being together.
This probably goes without saying, but buds have fun together. No matter if you are bored at home watching Television or painting the city red, it’s all the more tolerable when you’re together. As a result of enjoying spending time together, you and your buddy probably have tons of memories you’ve made together.
Decide if they help make you a better human.
Some people may pretend to be your pal, but they’d much rather see you fail or get into trouble. Incidents occur, of course. But, for the most chunk, this person must be a great influence on you. They inspire you to become a better human. For example, your buddy might push you to finish school, suggest that you mend fences with your estranged relatives, and motivate you to give back to others.
Reflect on how you feel when they’re around.
A true buddy must make you feel happier and more alive when you’re around them, instead of stressed out or drained. A day spent with your pal must leave you feeling excited, rejuvenated, and vibrant about life. They must be lifting you up, not tearing you down. Try to really think about what you’re hoping to get from your relationship. Does this friendship look and feel the manner you’d love to?
Notice that you have deep conversations with this person.
If a buddy asks “How’s it going?” you’re not pressured to respond with “good.” Instead, you’ll likely go right into how your father is stressing you out or how your pal is acting different way. · This component of communication between close contacts is often referred to as self-disclosure. You are more likely to disclose intimate details about yourself with a pal than you are with a complete stranger or casual acquaintance.
Question if they really understand you and still accept you.
Pals permit you to be who you are with no restrictions. If someone is your buddy, you have the luxury of showing them your true self—a self that many others might not fully know—but you can still count on this figure to love and accept you anyway.
· Buds don’t have to pretend with one another as many people do in casual relationships.
· A true pal must not want to change who you are. They will accept and embrace everything about you, even your crazy and silly parts. This does not signify they have to agree with everything you do or say, but they must not bash you or try to modify you.
Determine if they listen to you.
Pals won’t make it all about them in communication. In addition to knowing when to share, they also understand when and how to listen. Good listening skills in a pal are significant as you need to feel heard and understood by the humans you care about.
· Pay attention in your next conversation. Does your buddy take the time to hear your message before responding?
· Even if your buddy isn’t the best listener, it must be clear that they are trying to hear you out and not just talk about themselves.
Question if they respect your boundaries.
Healthy relationships of any kind need boundaries—friendships are no exception. A good buddy must be willing to acknowledge and respect those boundaries. At the same time, they must not feel threatened by them.
· For example, if you tell a pal that you don’t feel comfortable with them reading your journal or diary, they must respect your wish.
Figure out if they support you.
A buddy is someone who shows their affection for you in many manners, one of which is in their support for you and your goals, ideas, and interests. This person must be keen to clap for you when you are succeeding and support nurse your wounds when you are hurt.
Notice if they are forgiving.
Everyone makes faults, and your pal must be willing to accept that you’re no different. When you mess up and hurt their emotions, you might apologize and beg for their forgiveness. A good buddy will gratefully accept your apology and provide you with forgiveness. They won’t hold your misdeed over your head or utilize it to manipulate you.
Listen for honest feedback.
The matter that separates a pal from the general population is their investment in you as a human. They care about you, which signifies they are honest with you, even if what they have to say hurts. A buddy must offer constructive feedback if you’re not doing what you need to be doing. For example, they might say, “You want to get up and study for your science test. Your grade is already low…Come on. I’ll support you.”
Friends make life more satisfying and rich, that’s for certain. But sometimes it can be tough to tell when you’ve crossed the line from “acquaintance” to “friend” with another human. Learn to recognize who’s a friend in your life by searching for certain key elements. Look for qualities such as being dependable and loyal, spending time with you, and showing that they care.
